🔵 What you miss when you're never bored

You don't have to be bored anymore.

Cooking dinner? Throw in your AirPods. Waiting in line? Pull out your phone. Dishes, commute, bathroom break? There's always something to fill the silence.

For the first time in human history, you can go weeks, months, even years without ever being truly alone with your thoughts.

And on the surface, that sounds like progress. Boredom feels uncomfortable, so why wouldn't we eliminate it?

In truth, it's one of the most significant tragedies we face in modern times.

The most effective people on earth aren't the ones who've learned to avoid boredom.

They're the ones who've learned to embrace it.

Because on the other side of boredom lives everything that actually matters. Your best ideas, your deepest work, your most authentic connections.

The Value Of Boredom

It's in moments of boredom when you're closest to yourself and those around you.

There are no distractions, and actual presence is possible. This allows for deeper connections with others and the ability to tap into your true self when you're alone.

With external distractions gone, you begin to think clearly. Your ideas become more valuable. Problems that seem impossible are quickly resolved. Work gets done quicker and more effectively when you embrace the inevitable boredom rather than giving in every time it tries to pull you away.

Your mind needs space to connect dots. To synthesize information. To see patterns you've been missing. And that space only opens up when you stop feeding it constant external input.

The executives I work with who make the best decisions, the athletes who perform at the highest level under pressure, the entrepreneurs who see opportunities others miss, they all share one thing in common:

They've built a relationship with boredom instead of running from it.

They understand that boredom isn't dead time. It's where the deepest work gets done. It's where the best ideas are born. It's where competitive advantages are built.

Why We Run From Boredom

If boredom is so valuable, why do we run from it?

We run from it because our environment lets us: Boredom is uncomfortable, and when avoiding it is easier than sitting with it, most people will take the easy path. Your phone is always within arm's reach. The next episode starts in five seconds. The algorithm knows precisely what will keep you engaged. Avoiding boredom has never been easier, which means experiencing it has never been harder.

We run from boredom because we don't properly value it: In a culture that promotes constant action and endless productivity, sitting in silence loses its value. Why wouldn't I always have a podcast or YouTube video in my ear? Am I not losing an opportunity to grow if I don't? Yes, there is massive value in action, but there is also value in thinking. And the prerequisite to thinking is almost always boredom.

We've confused consumption with growth. We think that because we're always taking in information, we're always learning. But real learning requires processing time. Integration time. Time to let ideas settle and make sense of them. That only happens in the gaps.

And when it comes to action, the most valuable kind follows after overcoming boredom. Excellence requires thousands of iterations of the same action, which requires a mastery of boredom.

We run from boredom to run from ourselves: I mentioned earlier that it's in moments of boredom that you're closest to your true self. But what happens if you don't like yourself very much? You'd avoid any opportunity to think about who you are. Why sit with painful thoughts when you can scroll instead? If you always have external stimulation, you never have to stop and face who you are or what you want to become.

This is the deepest reason we avoid boredom, and it's the one nobody wants to admit.

When you're constantly distracted, you never have to face the questions you've been avoiding. Are you happy? Are you on the right path? Are your relationships as deep as you want them to be? What are you actually working toward?

These questions are uncomfortable. They require honest answers. And honest answers sometimes demand change.

So we scroll. We binge. We fill every quiet moment with noise. Not because we're learning or growing, but because we're hiding.

How To Embrace Boredom

The good news is that building your tolerance to boredom is entirely possible. It doesn't require drastic measures. It just requires intentionality.

Learn To Ride The Wave

Start to notice the moments you feel bored, and what you do to give in to that feeling.

Many of us have loops we go through when we feel bored, checking email, social media, the news, and starting again. When you notice boredom begin to creep in, rather than giving in, ride the feeling to its completion.

At first, it will feel hard, but with a bit of practice, it will be laughably easy.

The moment is fleeting. If you can sit with it for just a few seconds, the urge passes. And you're left with clarity and focus.

Schedule Boredom

In a world that is all gas, no brakes, having specific "bored" time is invaluable.

These could be long walks without headphones. A time where you sit in a room with just yourself and a notepad. Or simply doing the dishes with no podcast playing.

While this may be hard at first, it will quickly become some of the most valuable time in your schedule each week.

I'm not suggesting you meditate for hours or take a vow of silence. I'm talking about carving out small pockets of time where you deliberately do nothing but think.

Maybe it's a fifteen-minute walk after lunch. Perhaps it's the first ten minutes of your morning before you check your phone. Maybe it's your commute with the radio off.

The specific activity doesn't matter. What matters is that you protect this time. You don't let it get filled with the next urgent thing or the next piece of content. You guard it the same way you'd guard an important meeting.

Because it is an important meeting, it's a meeting with yourself.

Face The Deeper Cause

This will all be infinitely more difficult if you don't address the subconscious reasons you're uncomfortable sitting in your own thoughts.

Yes, you can build up your tolerance to boredom, but it won't matter if you're constantly fighting your subconscious.

If you're running from yourself, no amount of technique will make boredom comfortable. You have to do the deeper work of figuring out why you're running in the first place.

You can't outrun yourself forever. Eventually, you'll have to sit down and have the conversation you've been avoiding. The question is whether you do it now or after another decade of distraction.

What's Really At Stake

The people who change the world aren't the ones who consume the most content or stay the busiest.

They're the ones who create space to think. Who sits with problems long enough to see solutions others miss. Who repeats the most valuable work long past the point everyone else ran off to chase the next shiny object. Who builds deep enough connections with themselves to know what they actually want.

Boredom isn't something to eliminate. It's something to embrace.

Not because it feels good in the moment, but because what's on the other side of it is worth the temporary discomfort.

The world will keep getting louder. The distractions will keep getting better at distracting. And the path of least resistance will always be to give in.

But you're not built for the path of least resistance.

You're built for something more.

Where in your life are you avoiding boredom? And what might be waiting for you on the other side if you stopped filling the silence?

See you next week,
Elliot Roe